Why am I different? Why don't I connect with the world? Why am I behaving like I am? Why do I self destruct? Why do I think like I do? Why do I rebel? Why do I hurt?
I’ve spent most of my years asking those questions, accepting my lack of answers, and waiting for them to find me. What found me was total chaos.
Sat, emptier than the cell I had been confounded, I had a choice. Start to live, in life’s presence, or journey out of this world. The prison cell I sat in was nowhere near as harrowing as the cell in which my thoughts would bounce around. Continuous, consistent and exhausting. Being the third time in a cell, I didn’t even try and pretend this was my rock bottom. Experience had proven that wrong many a time. And I can now say with some confidence that you’ll only know you’ve hit the dregs when your looking down at them. My name is Daniel. I am an addict. Words that only now ring true in my ears.
At 36 I was a VP at a software company that I’d grown up with. To most, I would have been viewed as successful. I excelled in education, sport, have great friends and come from a loving family. After travelling the world I landed in Copenhagen; found my career and a place to be at my happiest. In reflection, that this was a foreign residence seems more likely hiding than a happy place. Having met my wife on holiday, I moved back to the UK and in the following 10 years we married, had 3 wonderful children and built a dream house.
I’d never felt comfortable in my own skin and had been drinking to negate worry, anxiety or focus on where I was going or where I belong. I couldn’t connect with a purpose, or what life was about so I just let it take me where it would. When I reached the finished line there was no celebration. The goalposts just moved. I was exhausted and took off the mask. Before I had a chance to even breathe, I was hit by the tirade of bullets I’d missed from the comfort of my hiding place. But as I took cover, the airstrike would this time ensure I had no safety and I would be ripped apart to a point of submission. Almost.
Rehab, redundancy, divorce and multiple times of sanctuary in hospital and jail all haunted me for the next 9 months. In June 2020, At 37, I made it to recovery. In 2021 I had a relapse but dusted myself off and in 2022 we launched Recoverlution.
Recoverlution started as I entered my own personal recovery, a truly enlightening and life-changing experience. I realised that life doesn't end when you finally admit you're suffering from addiction and crawl into recovery, it starts.
In the beginning, I found unquantifiable value in the continued connection and support from other addicts in recovery. I noticed, and continue to recognise, a significant lack of a dedicated platform glueing it all together.
Recovery is unique, organic and lifelong as you continue to help others and engage with mindful activities to aid your own growth. Recoverlution started as a journal, turned into a blog, evolved into a website and is transcending into a Platform that connects and shines a light on the wonderful world of recovery. Breaking down the stigma with a platform that embraces our individuality, helps us to continue to grow and empowers online communities to flourish.
Recovery is a journey, a timeless path to where we belong. Recoverlution is driven by everything and everyone that got me here. And here I plan to stay.